The Dying Art of Personal Letter Writing
July 26, 2009 – 7:28 pmAccording to an article I just read, traditional letters are being gradually replaced by the newer electronic ways of communicating such as e-mail, e-messaging, texting, and faxes, as well as by cheap long distance telephone and Internet voice transmission services. I’m sure this doesn’t come as a surprise to most of us. Personally, I use most of the above e-methods every day for both business and personal communications. They are quick and easy and, in most cases, get the job done.
Unfortunately, some people are taking this to the extreme and trying to achieve everything via these “quick and dirty” e-communication methods. I find this a little bit sad since the “personal touch” of a real “snail mail” letter in certain situations just can’t be replaced by what I sometimes refer to as “c-messaging”, the “c” standing for “convenience”.
In fact, I believe that there are still many situations where e-communication is not appropriate and/or not effective. In fact, you might be surprised to learn that the 27th most popular keyword phrase (out of hundreds) entered by people who arrive at my writing help websites is the term “friendly letter”. That means that thousands of people every month are looking for info on how to write something that they refer to as a “friendly letter”.
So, it seems that in spite of the trend towards the quick and easy e-message, some people realize the impersonal nature of these e-missives and are looking for something more. I can understand why. After all, how would you like to receive a text message or e-mail one-liner on something important such as an expression of sympathy or love? Say a parent or other loved one passes away; how would you like to receive an unsigned e-mail of sympathy in your inbox mixed-in with the usual assortment of spam and other junk e-mail? Or, what about receiving or sending an e-mail as a substitute for a traditional love letter? Do such communications ring true; are they really heartfelt? In my opinion, not at all.
To me, such messages speak volumes about their senders. It means that they can’t even be bothered to take the time to jot down a few heartfelt sentences by hand and sign the letter with their own signature. In my view, someone would have to wonder about the true sincerity of the sender and question why they even sent what they did. Was it just to cover off their bases? Were they just “going through the motions”? If so, maybe they might be better off sending nothing.
Even in cases where something is too long and laborious to write out by hand one can still add the personal touch. For example, a letter produced on a word processor, and then signed by hand and sent by regular mail conveys a lot more caring than a quick and easy off-the-cuff e-mail. It means that at least the author took the time and trouble to: properly format and edit a letter, address an envelope, purchase and affix a stamp, and finally, deposit the letter in a mailbox somewhere. When I receive such a letter it automatically tells me that the sender made some effort which shows me that they truly care and that their message is heartfelt and sincere.
Don’t get me wrong here; I am not against modern e-communications at all and, as I already stated, I use them every day in both my personal and business activities. However, there are many situations in our lives where e-messages just don’t suffice and a personal letter is the only way to sincerely communicate a message from your heart.
Ok, just before I get down off my soapbox here’s a sample of a typical “friendly letter”; examples of which some people are apparently still wanting to write:
http://www.writinghelp-central.com/friendly-letter-sample.html
14 Responses to “The Dying Art of Personal Letter Writing”
Hi Shaun,
I too wonder about the art of letter writing. It takes time to write a well composed, heartfelt message. And will the internet archive all those great personal messages better than a box full of old letters, to re-read for all the memories enclosed. Even the stamps, envelope color and writing style add to those memories. I too love the convenience of electronic messages, but the real meaningful words should be written down, not typed in.
Sincerely,
Rick
By Rick on Jul 26, 2009
Dear Sir,
I really find it wonderful to read your Writings!!!
I really agree with your statement “there are many situations in our lives where e-messages just don’t suffice and a personal letter is the only way to sincerely communicate a message from your heart.” Also e.g loved one passes away…
It’s really very interesting to read your writings that you are always use our surrending events to make your point. That’s a very good to learing procedure.
I salute you.
With Kind Regards
Mukti
By Mukti on Jul 27, 2009
Thanks. It is very useful to me.
By Fion W on Jul 27, 2009
Dear Shaun,
Me and my wife are still writing letters to each other, though I am calling her (in India) almost every second day over phone from herein Dubai. You know, the immense pleasure being provided by those letters are inexplicable.
Thanks.
By Gireesh Babu on Jul 27, 2009
Dear Shaun,
The thing about email is, it is fast and there is no question about that, however, I’m still thrilled to receive a personal letter delivered by a mailman. I could feel the sincerity of the writer for taking his time to express his feelings, whatever it is! On my part, I feel a deep gratitude.
Thanks a lot for your message.
Barbara
By Barbara on Jul 27, 2009
I used to love handwriting letters, epecially with a fountain pen, but as you say other ways seem to have taken over. But I still type out personal emails, and responses like this one.
By G.S.Commander on Jul 27, 2009
Hi Shaun,
I definitely agree with you the that internet services will not suffice, and that writing letters is the only way to communicate and express your feelings.
By Mariam Hussain on Jul 27, 2009
Shaun, I write my husband a love letter every year on our anniversary (and sometimes in between). He has framed them all and put them on our bedroom wall. That tells me how much he appreciates a hand written letter telling him of my love for him. It’s so sad that writing is going out and being replaced by computers.
By Betty Draughn on Jul 27, 2009
Hi dear Shaun,
Much thanks for your lively and intelligent article. It was warm for my heart and brain, though (as you can guess) English is not my native language. I think your “soul manifestation” proves (in my eyes) that personal letters may be much stronger than the common modern surrogate, even in business situations.
I must confess that, in part, I use your letters as my English lessons.
My good wishes!
Danila
By Danila on Jul 27, 2009
A few years ago I read an article about the growing popularity of e-mail and its replacement of handwritten notes. I have forgotten who wrote the article but I have never forgotten her message. I paraphrase…”while these quick messages may be just as heart felt, how wonderful is it to re-read precious words in a loved ones own hand”. Those words have always struck me when I wanted to reach out to someone.
By Deanna Hebert on Jul 27, 2009
Hi Shaun,
I really got touched with the topic you chose this time.
‘Are Personal Letters Becoming Extinct?’
Remember those days when telephones were not very common,STD calls were very costly and unaffordable for most of the people, mobile phones had not been invented and the major source for long distant communication was postal letters. I belong to India and what I am referring to is just about 2 decades back.
Personal letters were in practice. Personal letters are not simply the words written on the piece of paper. They used to carry emotions, feelings, sentiments and a sense of belongingness. People back at home used to wait endlessly for the postman and literally run to the door once they would hear the knock from a postman. While reading such letters from the near ones, the tears were difficult to be stopped…. emotions were simply impossible to be controlled. And these letters were preserved as a precious property. I trust you will believe that my parents have preserved letters that are some 40-50 years old.
Shaun, I too have become little emotional while typing this mail to you.
Coming back to the topic. Well Yes, personal letters have indeed become an Extinct.
Today’s fast world has replaced these letters by mobile phones. If one has to ask about the wellbeing of the near ones, he/she would prefer giving a call, saying hi, how are you, I love you, I miss you and other formal things in few minutes rather than typing few words expressing sentiments in a email. We are losing our values. We are forgetting them.
Shaun, these are my personal views as I belong to a united joint Indian family, where right from grandparents, granduncles to grand children stay together in one home. We call it a Sweet home. So I really have a feel about the personal letters.
Well Shaun, the topic you chose prompted me to write to you and the fact is that even I could not stop myself in giving my personal views.
I would welcome comments not only from you but from your dear readers too.
With Warm Regards,
Vineet Kumar
By Vineet on Jul 27, 2009
Dear Shaun,
your messages are very interesting and useful. I would like to learn many things. I’m hoping I can receive your messages on and on.
By Zohreh on Jul 27, 2009
Dear Shaun,
I have improved my letter writing cabability to a great extent by following advice in your e-mails. I still keep the personal letters which touched my heart that I received from people from time to time.
Best regards,
Antony
By antony on Jul 28, 2009
Dear Mr. Shaun,
Thank you so much for your help and for today’s writing exercise. Please let me introduce myself.
I am Fanaye from Ethiopia, Addis Ababa my age 26, sex female, not married , and I am living with my family: mom, dad and 1 sister and 2 brothers, and I am 3rd daughter in my family. The reason why I want to learn this course is to get a better opportunity in life. Life in Ethiopia is not easy. I have graduated from College in secreterial science and office management I am working in different organizations but my sallary is not enough for everything; even for day-to-day for transportation and food for my brothers and mother. Because of this I have to find a better job, and the best jobs in our country are with NGO’s. To do this I have to get even more education and I have to develop my English language speaking writing,..etc. So I would like to say thank you so much for giving me the chance to learn from this free course. God Bless you. I hope after I finish this course I am going to apply to different NGOS. The big difference between NGO’s and local jobs in my country is that NGO’s are paying US$500 per month and the others don’t pay more than $150 in a month. So that is not enough and since I am from a very poor family I have to keep trying and trying anyway. I am so happy to write this to you. Thank you again.
Fanaye
Addis Ababa, Ethiopia
By Fanaye on Aug 27, 2009